The Fragile Heart of a Child

I won’t make this post very long but there is something I need to say.  In the last few years I was able to put a word on what a sibling and I experienced growing up.  It robbed us of our childhood and our right to ever feel truly secure with another human being.  It took away our joy and our right to bring  joy and happiness to others.

Out of four siblings, only two of us got the unpleasant distinction of being emotionally abused.  I would say physically abused but I have seen physical abuse and while our parent liked to use corporeal punishment, it was bearable.  In fact, looking back, hitting us would have been preferential to the emotional abuse we endured.  The other two siblings never once experienced this trauma.  In fact, to talk about it now, the siblings deny it ever happened to us.  We were “bad”, “rotten”, “bitches” who got on a parent’s nerves.  It wasn’t until I read A Child Called It by David Pelzer that I realized how one parent could possess a distinct hatred for one or more children and love the others.

There is no visible rhyme or reason as to why this parent chose this rationale.  It would be a much deeper examination of this parent’s childhood that would reveal the answer but they guard their secrets like Fort Knox.  They live in denial.  Fortunately, there is a family member who is always willing to tell you of their experiences both good and bad.

Why am I telling you all of this?  Why am I stating the obvious?  Children hurt easily.  They don’t have to be in an abusive setting to get damaged.  They are damaged enough by unkind words and actions.  They get heartache at school as well.  All I am asking is that the next time you are working with children or are in the company of a niece or nephew, say a kind word.  That kind word will make more of a difference than you will ever know.